dating married man with 2 children, advice please

can i please get some advice about that topic its very important!!!

Don't get caught there. If will always choose his wife and kid. In the end you be left heart broken. Don't be that person, that women that would brake up a family. You can't have self respect if you do this.

Plus if he really love you, he will leave his wife and still be a father and then come back to you. At least then it will better and with better chance to success.

DON"T BE A MISTRESS !!!!

you need to decide if you can live the rest of your life being a homewrecker. if he had any respect for you or his family or even his future family with you.... he would not put you in this kind of predicament. if he is not happy in his marriage then he needs to end that first, before building into another entire relationship. besides, how much respect do you really have for him for doing this to his family in the first place? sometimes things do not work out, in which case you take the high road, try to fix the problems in your marriage, and end things maturely if neccessary. i agree above, do not be a mistress.... his family will never respect you and you will never respect yourself.

I agree with the above. Why would you want to be with a man that oes around his own wife and kids backs to be with anothernwoman? Sounds like he wants to have his cake and eat it too. How do you go to sleep at night knowing that at any minute the wife can find out and toucan help ruin the family? This guy is the one to blame if you wot be with him someone else will. This is therype of man that uses women. I'd hemleavws his wife that's one thing, then i wish yourhr best, but until that day comes have a little more self respect and leave him alone

Well I'm ashamed to say that I was in a similiar situation as you. I knew it was wrong,so I had to make the best choice for me. And my best advice(from experience) would be to leave him alone. Because as someone said earlier and from what I know he's always going to choose his wife and family over you. We only had 1 sexual encounter,but 1 time was enough for me to realize that ONE-he was only using me b/c he said he and his wife were constantly arguing over different things (ex.he had just lost his job,I guess I was his temporary shoulder to cry on until they made up),TWO-I found out shortly after that his wife was pregnant(so I guess that they weren't having sex as much as he wanted,so once again I was a temporary quick fix),and THREE-I don't like being second best,so I decided to stop talking to him before I started to develop deeper feelings for this man because in the end it won't even be worth it. And even if he decided to leave his wife,he might later on realize that he still loves her and eventually leave you in a bad situation that way. So run away from this man as fast as you can for you own sanity........

Julia...i would really like to talk to you about this. im in the same situation for 2 years now. would really like to discuss this with you. Please email me at This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it .

I did the same thing. Mine left his, now ex-wife. He went through a very bitter custody battle. I never realized how bad it could get. Just be prepared to go through a lot of crap to be with this man.

It's amazing the kind of advice and support I see here. I'm in the same situation and have been with this man for a year now. He is in the process of a separation/divorce but has 2 little girls. The thought of him even being with them bothers me to no end. I'm so ashamed I feel this way because I would hate it if I were a child being left by my dad or even an ex wife who's left to fend for myself with 2 girls. But, the truth of the matter is, I need to value me an my wants before theirs. This man says he loves me and wants to build a future with me but the vision of the future I have is not with someone else's children coming in and out of my home. I love this man but being forced to deal with his children frustrates me and watching how he fawns over them angers me because those children are not mine.
Just be prepared to be left behind and cut off without even a second look OR for the toughest relationship in the world. Really, I don't recommend or wish this kind of relationship on any woman, no matter how vile she is. It's a lot of second guessing, doubting him and yourself, killing of your self-worth and integrity and sacrifice/compromise on your end. I have many times wondered why I even stick around and take this from a relationship I'm so unhappy with but the truth of the matter is, what's between him and me is unbelievable. Without all the frustrations and tension caused by his other world, what we have would flourish and be absolutely beautiful. If you choose to stick around and he plans on being with you and doing whatever it takes to make your life the best it can be given the situation, try your best to focus on the good. It will be the hardest thing to do in the WORLD.
Best of luck to you...and all the women out there, like myself and a few others on this thread, that are constantly feeling beaten up and defeated about this. We deserve better and love should never be THIS hurtful...but I'm also a firm believer that good love doesn't come easy either.

Dear HatingEveryMinute,

I can understand the difficulties you encounter in dating a man with children/divorced, but I ask that you take a step back and re-read some of your post. Yes you deserve love and to be treated better, but I would hope that a man would choose his children over a simple desire to be with another woman. Too often we don't commend men for working to keep families together, and he is doing just that. Rather than looking at him in a harsh light, consider that he is trying his best to take care of his girls and be in their lives. And someday, they may grow to be women who choose loving stable partners rather than ones who leave like so many fathers do. I guarantee by supporting your man, he will not only appreciate you, but he will feel that you are really part of his "family," and this is where you truly wan to be. But if you choose to look elsewhere for a single man, that is alright to, and let him continue on with his kids and maybe meeting a partner with a similar life situation.

I think without juding that every human being needs company in one point of our life and we look for it but when we look for our happiness we don't see more than that. Don't break a family or don't be the reason why. You should be able to build a family starting for looking a single guy for u star a family without hurting or feeling bad about anything.

Hope you really do a best choose because sometimes we loose so many things for a second of happiness or we wanna feel something that is not real.

Troy is 100% right!

Hello.
Hello I am Miss Joy how are you! hope you are fine and in perfect condition of health.I went through your profile and i read it and took interest in it,if you don't mind i will like you to write me on this ID This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it hope to hear from you soon, I will be waiting for your mail because i have something VERY important to tell you. Lots of love,Joy !

When i was 23 i started dating a man with two kids, he seemed being very serious about me in the first two months and then he just put me aside and the center of our relationship became his children, it was a nightmare because i fall in love him, in fact he was the first one i ever loved so much and therefore I thought I could handle everything. His daughter unfortunately lost her mother just a year ago, so she didn't only thought of me as a rival to her daddy but also to her dead mommy, poor child, i saw her torments, she was asking about intimate details of our relationship which i refused to tell because i knew it will hurt her a lot (i said it wasn't a custom in my family to talk about adult affairs), she couldn't act out because of the strict father, so when we were alone she would just start behaving erratically, i pitied her, i couldn't tell on her to her father at first, then i asked him to talk with her about the place i had in his life, she continued doing it in every subtle way so she won't be caught, my last drop was when she invited her girlfriend and they were laughing behind my back but i didn't tell anything to J., because i always tried to see it her way, she lost her mom and i also felt the pain and shame of me physically replacing her mom in her dad's life, but then, after her friend went away, she asked her father to stop us kissing in our house in the presence of others, and i just shut off at this point. I simply stopped any communication with this child, i would help her whenever she needed the help, especially when her father wouldn't be home or would be busy, i didn't want to be frustrated or angry anymore, i didn't want anything, my boyfriend said that i had my reason of doing so but that he couldn't be seriously engaged with the women who can't forgive a child, he said that he doesn't want to create a new family with me, that he already has "his pot" and i can either become the part of this pot and add to it whatever i wanted or just leave him. I loved him so much, more than myself, i loved his little boy who became very close for me, but i couldn't just break through that girl's animosity, i never blamed her, she couldn't control but this animosity never faded, although i did nothing bad towards her and i always felt responsible for her when her dad was away and i tried really hard to keep our relation with J. but eventually i failed, he broke my heart, i know he loves me in some sense but he loves his children more. My advice to you, guys, date the man you like but be careful and consider his kids before you fall in love, it's hard but it's better, God knows what pain i went through, we broke up and would never meet again.

Have you thought about how your affair will devastate his wife and children, do you care? Have you considered that you may destroy his family, or is this your intent?

Do you really think he doesn’t know you for what you are? Do you realize that in the end he will most likely dump you? I bet you care now.

Be smart and walk away before you are the recipient of the same heart wrenching pain and devastation, you are calculating intending to inflict on his wife.

Or you could continue in your relationship and get exactly what you deserve.