Does my ex girlfriend still want to be with me?

This is a bit long, but please if you start reading, this means more to me than I can ever imagine anything ever meaning to me.

My girlfriend broke up with me only 2 days ago. We had been going out for almost 2 years, and we were very much in love. We were amazingly happy together and never had arguments.

We got together at the start of my final year in college, and quickly fell head over heels for each other. After only 5 months, we had decided we wanted to spend our summer together in another country. I know in most parts of the world, moving in so soon after the start of a relationship is normal, but in Ireland, this never happens - all the same we felt right about, and excited. We had the most amazing summer together, and knew we were destined to be with each other. We talked about everything we had right now, and everything we had to look forward to - such as moving in together permanaently, having children, growing old together. It was like a fairytale. Im 23 and shouldnt believe in fairytales, but after that summer and getting to know her, I do.

When we got back to Ireland, it was my girlfriend who was starting her final year. For the first 4 months, everything felt great, we were getting even closer to each other and really falling deeper in love. However, after Christmas, my girlfriend really needed to focus on her thesis (which I willingly and lovingly helped her with). Straight after the these there was study, and then exams. The day her exams finished she went to London for a week, and when she came home she moved back to her home with her parents for the summer to try and save up some money. I never realised all along there was a problem, and until last week, I still hadnt.

I felt the summer apart would be tough on us, I only got to see her once in June because of alot of family commitments on my side (my parents recently divorced and Im trying to help both of them through it). But even after 3 weeks, everything still seemed amazing, in fact it seemed better because we hadn't seen each other for so long and were so competely addicted to each other.

But a week ago, my girlfriend said she was feeling like she was missing something from us for the last 6 months, and had only realised literally that day that she thought she wasn't in love with me anymore. I had not known any of this - we seemed perfect and she never told me how she was feeling, because she was afraid to hurt me. She tried to break up with me, but found it too hard (as did I, I couldnt let her go). She had to go home that weekend again for work, and I felt petrified as to what just happened, I felt like a rabbit caught in the headlights and didnt react.

Then last Tuesday, she came to visit me - I was so scared as to what was going to happen. We broke up. She said she was crying all weekend over us, and really felt that we had to break up because she was missing something. She still wanted to be the best of friends and wanted me to still be close to her because I was the best part of her life, but felt she would not be feeling empty if we broke up, as she felt she had more to give.

Since then we have talked everynight on the phone, and text all day long. She says she still loves me. I still love her. She also says she is worried that she was too rash in her decision to break up, and has started agreeing with me that the reason she was feeling like that was because we weren't able to be ourselves with the pressure of her thesis, study, exams and time apart (and my job) shadowing us for the last 6 months.

She says the time apart since the end of college helped her to realise something was missing, but she also agrees with me now that what she felt during that time was might have been her missing being with me. She doesn't think we will get back together because she doesnt believe someone truely in love would ever hurt another person by breaking their heart like this, but I know when people are confused they can do anything and even though it seems to make sense, down the line it doesn't.

I am worried that if we stay apart too long she will start to justify this to herself more so than she is doing and really believe that we cant be together, and one day she will realise it was a mistake and its too late.

I have asked her if we can get back together and try and work our what she was feeling together, as we never got the chance to do that. She tried to work it out herself, and undoubtedly that affected how she felt as it was putting alot of stress and pain on her. I didnt realise then, but I know now that was the case. If I had known I would have done everything to talk to her, open up with her and try to rekindle whatever it was that we had lost.

I know that once someone falls in love with somebody, they can do it over and over and over, and each time it feels even more amazing. I know she was in love me, she openly admits to it and said it was the most amazing feeling she ever had - but she doens't believe she can feel that with me anymore. All I can see is that with everything that went on in the last 6 monthsof our relationship, it would have been tough for there not to have been some changes there to how we normally were - and obviously these changes made her forget she was in love with me.

If we could be together, without the stress of what happened over the last 6 months, without worryng when we are going to see each other again because of the distance between us, I know we can both be in love with each other again.

I need to know what to do. I am afraid if I leave her to it she will forget what being in love as a couple feels like. I also know this space can help her realise that what she really wants is to be with me - since the only thing that makes her unhappy (and she only feels unhappy sometimes) is feeling like she is missing something, I know there is every chance she can miss me more and realise it was a mistake to break up.

I also really feel like chasing this, and not letting go at all. We promsied to each other we would never let go, and until last week we were still saying 'forver'. I would not feel right if I did not fight for the girl I truely love with all my heart, but I know that this could also push her further away by upsetting her.

I know one of the answers to this will that if I truely love her then let he do what she wants to make her happy. But I dont think she knows what she wants, she says herself she is deeply confused by everything at the moment, she knows being with me makes her happy, and she loves being with me. But she hates that she can feel like something is missing. She says she can be too critical, and that she can often get scared of a good thing and always wants something better - personally I dont see that in her, I dont want her to settle for me but I dont want her falsely thinking that she wants something better.

Can someone please tell me what to do, and please also leave advice on what my ex-girlfriend should do, as I have no doubt this is something we should share. I may tell her about this, I may not - I dont want her to be offended by me posting this but I do want to try and help her through this, but I would much prefer to do this as her boyfriend.

Thank you all for your help.

Sorry about being so late on this, 8 moths ago, what i think u should do is take this exact letter and copy and paste it in an email to <email> He will definitely give you the answer you need to hear and to clear up any misconceptions. You need "The System"

Sorry am late wrote:

Sorry about being so late on this, 8 moths ago, what i think u should do is take this exact letter and copy and paste it in an email to <email> He will definitely give you the answer you need to hear and to clear up any misconceptions. You need "The System"

Tell me how it went, email me @ <email> I wrote the above message to you.

I believe you do truly love her. You can sence the emotions in your words. You guys are young and have your whole life ahead of you. You need to understand that she is going threw a change, it doesnt mean she doesnt love you, or feel one day the two of you could be together again. This is time she needs to take for herself, because work and school are very stressful, dont be scared that you will lose her. Above all as much as it hurts you have to let her go and figure her life out how she wants to do it. making her feel obligated to your feelings is going to drive her away. By letting go i dont mean cut her out of your life continue to be her friend, call her and txt but just cut back. The best thing you can do is continue to live, focus on yourself. Obsessing over her and what she is doing is only gonna go 2 things, make you sick, and make your mind go crazy!

it is very tough, i sort of did the same thing to my ex boyfriend who is also my sons father, but he would keep trying and trying and all it did was make me realize he doesnt respect me. So why would i want to be w someone who doesn't respect me? you need to let her live, you respect her and love her dont you? then give her some space. she is gonna miss you, she is gonna think of you, and the love you guys have felt doesn't easily just fade away, it takes a long time. and besides you never fully lose intrest in something that once brought you great pleasure! give it time and maybe if anything that comes out of you two is a really kick **** friendship and sometimes thats even more worth it. you have your whole life out ahead of you as well. lords only knows. so dont stress, be happy, smile, share your love in anyway you can threw friendship. cuz like the old saying goes its better to have loved then never loved at all.

good luck to you

i wish i had some anwsers to give u but i wasnt gonna leave your page without sayin anythang. i feel the pain your goin threw. its a feeling you never j=knew u could have me n my gurlfrined broke up a month ago. but sometimes we act like were together we kiss hug n go over to each others houses. idk wat to do either i wanna be together or dont be together its just so confusing for me. i cant even focus on my school work it interfears with eveythang around me. drinking is the only way i can get her off my mind. but i dont want it to be that way i wanna kno how to deal with it????? i guess were on the same page are storys are just a lil different... goodluck to you though i hope u find someone that makes it worth your wild.

I feel your pain. I have been in the same place. I would recommend giving her time she needs to figure herself out. It is so hard to do this, and time goes by so slowly. She will look up to you, and respect you more, because you let her figure out what she wanted to by herself. The good part about this is when she knows what she is missing you will know very shortly after she figures this out. If she comes running after you it is meant to be. If not what she was missing probably does not include you.

Don’t lose contact with her, make her miss you! This will make her think of all of the great time you shared together.

I know how you feel. I have been through this before. I did not talk to my ex for 15 months. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done. One day when I least expected it, I got an email from her. It took some work, a lot of work.

My best advice is let her go, and think about you. If she really wants it she will give you signs, then you have to work with her very slowly, and pull her emotions out 1 by 1.

Wow this sounds remarkable similiar to my situation.
Two people obviously in love in every way but an outside situation ruined the chemistry challening the female counterpart of her affection of the guy that's oblivious to the problem until it's too late.
Yup, sounds like my situation, except there wasn't as much communication about it as much before it happened.

It's tough. It's a matter of trial and error. Even though your situation may be resolved I'll type this for any one else who may read and related to this.
Try dissappear and tell her you understand and move on, for about a few weeks. Explore other options with new friends even women, but be platonic.
Then check back and see has anything changed.
If not, then tell her you are going to go on with your life. If she doesn't come crawling back to you within a few weeks, nothing will, and as sad as it is, you love for each other just wasn't that strong.

I'm struggling trying to figure out how to win my gal back now. It's been almost 2 years, and our 3rd break up all initiated by her. I tried to give her space, didn't work.
So I tried to coax her to go out with me on a friendly date. Almost worked but she rejected the idea kindly.
So I'm trying to come back in her life slowly being very open and understanding. Now another gal seems to like me, and I'll meantion some general topics and talk about myself and my life to get her to open up and talk to me, then talk about the new girl as something else in my life and ask her for advice. Then mysterious dissappear on her again. I want to see if I can trigger her emotions to want me because she could truly lose me to this new woman.

Wow it seems like were all going through the same thing. The best thing we can as men is to just let them go and if they come back and then that's how u know that they really love u. Me and my ex been together for almost 5 years were even engaged but during our 3rd month of engagement she called it because she wasn't ready right now were in our junior year of college and she feels that she need to talk to other guys. Now every time me and her talk it seem like she still wanna be with me because we hug and kiss

but now I finally told her that ima walk away from this because she is just playing with my emotions. So I just thought in my head that the best thing for me is just to let her go and hope that she realizes that she lost someone who truly love her no matter what. Girls like to play games and see if they can get u back so don't fall for their tricks. I know u guys miss y'all girls and I miss mines to but there's nothing we can do but just move on and try to focus on ourselves and make everything right with us. Once ur ex girlfriend sees that u guy moved on she will want u back. Try not talking to them don't intiate contact let them be the one who calls u or text u. Well I hope u guys get ur exes back and I hope I get mines too. But be strong that's what u have 2 do.

hai,i know what you are going through right now but please,give your selvs sometime apart to sink this all thing in your minds and really know what you both want,you've been through a lot together and built the strongest of bonds that can never be broken,i mean its easy to burry than to forget.a frog realises the importance of water only when the well dries up,she might probably be trying you,so the best thing to do is never show that you are hurt and that you really need her.
Tell her that you have your own life to live and that you have the right to happiness and joy,take good care of your self and this will make you re discover who you are now after all the experience and stay focused and ambitious,try to make her a bit jealous by finding female freinds and just have goodtimes with them,tell her you are searching for someone to complete you one again.
Dont make her feel sorry for you in any way,but try to make her want you even more,by being serious about your new plans and new parter,if she really wants to move one she must make it clear to you,and have nothing to do with you,God saves the best for the last so the best is yet to come.I know love is like war,easy to start but hard to end,.Time is the best healler.This could not be easey and the best advise so far but just worked for me in two occursions right now .

tha

Ok this is what you do. You get the album White Blood Cells By the White Stripes. Jack White will take it from there..

this actually helped me too... i did exactly what you said not to do.. i made her obligated to take my feelings into consideration and so i feel like im pushing her to liking another man... and like an idiot i keep doing the same thing thinking it will work.. but now i see it doesnt. so give her space. dont metion this new guy and stop telling her how i feel if she already knows. thank you. its really hard.. and i hope i didnt mess it up for good.

Young man. Let me put this as succinctly as I can. She USED YOU. Forgive me for saying so, but you sound like a SAP. THAT IS EXACTLY WHY SHE LEFT YOU. You were TOO PREDICTABLE and TOO SAPPY. Women love a challenge and YOU WERE NOT THAT. She got bored with you. She never loved you because she doesn't know what love is yet. You two were addicted to each other and that is the hardest kind of "love" to get over. I feel for you, man. You have just been "played" by an immature, heartless, self-centered little bi-atch. Until you figure out who you are, what you like, what you want, what you value, you are not fit to be with a woman. At least not without being at risk of having your heart handed back to you. Women can be self-centered, heartless little creatures. DO NOT define yourself by your relationship with a woman. DEFINE YOURSELF first and THEN find a kind, tender-hearted woman who will support your dreams, share your values and RESPECT YOU. Anything short of that means you are with the WRONG WOMAN or you don't know yourself or your direction in life. Suck it up, young man and stop being a pansy. Your were played. Now, find out who the hell you are, what matters most to you in life, and THEN find a good woman to support you and your vision and plan for YOUR life. Anything short of that is just "child's play." Sorry for being so harsh, but the TRUTH hurts (a lot). YOU are the prize......not her!

hi i was reading ur post. it sound and obvious u still miss her. well it happen to me as well, i was in school so was she the thing i love about her is her smile, her voice she mean something to me. not only that she also made a big impact through my life so we kissed on the last day of class she got accept at muffles college while i got accepted at technical college as well but we were very apart then. on valentines day i sent her a poem and a love letter on how much i miss her and all. all i got of response is that she has someone else and i anything goes wrong its my fault. so i stayed i waited for 7 years so that we can talk about it. even to this year still haven't found the way to talk to her. afraid that she would freak out again. s

ok so if you read my situation, you will see that I have been through a similar situation, but in the end its the same and most women work the same way. The fact is that you are attached to each other and after two years, even if you buy a dog and spend two years with them, you will grow attached.. Just an analogy to describe how powerful dependency and attraction can be. When my ex started to do the same things your ex is doing, I didnt give her space and i tried to find out all the answers and i pushed her into making a hasty decision which was the downfall of our relationship. The truth is that , she should want to be with you unconditionally, if she trully loves you , and you are soulmates, there should be no doubts. In order to make her want to be with you again, you have to employ the NO CONTACT rule... Tell her that you accept her decision baout the break up and you need some time to reevaluate things for your self as well and that this will be a good time for the both of you.. Its never too late to employ this.. You might be thinking this is the opposite of what your supposed to do , but believe me its exactly what you want to do . During this time she will have time to realize what it is to miss you and you have to let that happen on its own. She should not do anything, she will do what she wants at the end of the day, but with absence the heart grows fonder. Just leave her be, dont worry she wont be running off to some other guy if you dont talk to her, she will be thinking of you.. Even if she does, it will work in your benifit , because you wont be there to be her emotional saftety net that she can fall back on, and that will make her new relationship collapse. After some time goes by she will call you or text you , dont pick up right away or text back like your eagerly waiting like a puppy. You have to man up , and do it the right way from the start. reply but always a day later or at the earliest 6 to 8 hours after she texts you so that she knows your world doesnt revolve around hers and girls want what they cant have .. If you want her back , and you want her to stay this time then you have to train her and make sure she doesnt make the same mistake twice. otherwise you will fall back into the same trap and then she will walk all over you . Trust me, I learned all this the hard way, and I made all of these mistakes before, If i employed these things from the first summer she told me she needed space, she would still be here, but it was my constant nagging and willingnes for answers that made her turn away from me. Be unavailable to her and when she pushes for a meeeting, let her know you will let her know when you have time because your busy, after which agree to go out and once you have your meeting. Keep your hands to yourself, unless she makes the first move, and keep your meeting short and simple. Do NOT bring up the relationship first, talk about general stuff, if she brings it up then dont get too emotional , be cold, and just talk normally.. Keep the meeting short and let her know you have to go, especially if the meeting is a hostile one or headed up **** creek... By leaving early you will make her want more next time, and you will have to rebuild this relationship from scratch, but if you think its not worth it then erase all memory of her and move on.. ITs not worth wasting your time, because I wasted 8 months of my life.. Now i can finally move on.. Trust me.. All of the above works if you employ it correctly.. Good luck to you .

honestly it sounds like for some reason the switch inside of her has turned off. girls are real sneaky when it comes to these things. i would suggest you just let her be and not give her to much attention be a friend but not a boyfriend to her. and eventually the tables with turn. the tables always turn my friend. for some other reason unbenounced to you you will find that she will come running back to you with i love you's and i miss you's. you just make sure you keep your cool. and dont chase after her one bit. give her a reason to miss you man!!!!!!!

this is for BETRAYED GENTLEMEN~ i like your point, and i have a slight situation. so my ex and i were together for a while, but she has had issues commiting because of our differences in religions. She keeps coming in and out of my life over the last 6 months.. recently we stopped tlaking before she went on her trip to spain for 6 weeks at the end of which she will be returning, im doing my thing and im dating other girls, but she sent me an email after 3 weeks of not contacting me or saying bye and said that she is learning about my religion and that she finds it very interesting.. I responded, i was thinking of not responding like you said make her miss you, but i responded and i asked what she learned and made some suggestions now she is taking her sweet time to respond.. ? what do you make of this..? agian im out and bout and not hung up on her , but it seems like we are just going round and round in circles if you catch my drift.. Thanks

Hmm, that seems pretty tough. It seems possible that you missed signals from her in your own pink-tinted haze of being in love, or maybe being away from you working, etc. distracted her and then she convinced herself that actually there was something wrong between you.

To me it sounds like something she imagined and then began to believe was true, possibly because she was working and didn't have very much time to see you. If my girlfriend gets really tired, sometimes I'll say "I love you" to her, and she just stares at me and leaves a pregnant pause. Sometimes I laugh because now I know not to panic when she does it, but sometimes it still upsets me. Either way I know she does love me, but sometimes when girls get tired/stressed out, (and guys too,) especially when making decisions regarding their life (remember that your girlfriend is just finishing college and about to take the next step) they might feel kind of unemotional about other things, and then decide that rather than the lack of emotions coming from something else like stress, they conclude they are not in love anymore. Really, it's a scary time after you finish college, and you begin to examine "the rest of your life" and question your path and direction. If she spent a whole weekend crying over your relationship and she calls you all the time, she should ask herself if the emotions she feels for you have really died -- it sounds like they haven't. You should also take into account that the crazy "in-love, addicted" feeling doesn't last forever, but that doesn't mean you don't love each other... in fact, I tend to believe that it is only after that feeling passes some that you really are in love. Frankly, I feel that your relationship without any arguments or any doubt couldn't go on forever, that's not realistic. Every married couple fights and every lover has moments of doubt. Actually, I feel like everybody with a long-term girlfriend has had to have a long talk from time to time about relationship worries and fears. You really should just talk to her. Don't pressure her or beg her to come back to you or anything like that, just ask her what she's feeling and what lead to her decision to break up. If she made a mistake, she may realize it in talking with you. If not, at least you'll understand her reasons and you may find you agree that it is a positive decision. Ask her what exactly is "missing." That seems fairly abstract to me. There are plenty of concrete reasons for relationships to end, abstract reasons aren't really good enough, I don't think. Remember not to lose confidence in yourself. If you know that you treat her well, are caring, trustworthy and attractive, believe in those things, she can't really ask for anything more from anybody. She may realize she is taking you for granted. I mean, your relationship sounded pretty good, is she expecting cosmic perfection? She'll find out pretty quickly that it doesn't exist.

I am cautious to make a judgment on your relationship, though, since I have only heard your description of it as "dreamy and perfect." I mean, girls want more things than guys. Ha ha, this sounds like a stereotype, but in my case I've found it to be absolutely true. I could pretty much be happy to just be with my girlfriend in an empty room, but my girlfriend might start to feel there was "something missing" if we do the same things too often or there's not enough variation or I leave it too long between doing little romantic things for her like writing her little love notes or giving her little boxes of chocolates or something. She doesn't demand these things, but I appreciate that she needs more out of the relationship than I do and more reassurance. I mean, we both love each other and we're happy to be together in any capacity, but sometimes she needs more, and I've had to learn to deal with that. I guess where I'm going with this... while you might have been in love dreamland, she might have decided she found a problem that you didn't notice because from your perspective everything was perfect. It can be really hard in the state of being "in love" to notice problems, or at least to acknowledge them without turning them into something great: "I have cancer! That's wonderful! Think of all the time we'll spend together in the hospital, you holding my hand and us struggling through it together! It can only strengthen our love!"

I should say that it seems a little unfair that she hit you with it without much warning and for a nebulous reason. She would do well to remember that there are no perfect relationships. Really, the best you can hope for is a decent person who's your best friend as well as your lover, who you trust and care about and support through even bad times. Being "in love" is one thing, it makes you overlook faults and create perfection, but find somebody who you know you will still admire and who will be your best friend even after that passes. Let her know you still love her and be supportive and caring of her figuring out what she needs to do, and she may change her mind.

Also, giving her space and letting her want you, as someone else suggested, isn't a bad idea. Like the old saying, "sometimes you don't know what you have until you think you've lost it."

im sorry to hear this man, i recently went (still am) going through this same thing, i miss my ex so much and love her we basically had the same thing no fights just love and a trip away from it all. and im only 19. its probably better just to leave it and move on my dude, it **** blows... but one day the depression will go away and the world will fall back into place

For ricky123. To be frank, it seems a little odd for your religion to be at stake in your relationship. If it's really important to you that your partner believes the same way, you should probably search for someone already within your religion. I don't know what your religion is, but I know that if someone I was interested in dating started giving me "suggestions" about religion instead of showing interest in me, I'm not sure I'd be really excited to respond. Religion is good for many things, but igniting passionate romantic relationships is not generally one of them, except perhaps in the case of two people who are already similarly devout.

To me, it sounds like she is interested in you. Since you've given her the indication that in order to be with you she needs to understand your religion, she is making some effort to show interest. However, it sounds like you are not really interested in her, you are interested in your religion. You take her effort to show polite interest in it for granted and give her another hurdle to jump over by requiring her to respond to your advice about it, which she probably didn't want. If you were really interested in her, you would probably say "don't worry about the religion, I want you back." Like I say, if religion is that much of an obstacle, I don't think you're interested enough in her to overcome it.

boom.

Hello All:

I am a 34 year old woman who has been married fir several years. I have read the original post and some comments. I might be able to provide some insight into the situation. If everything was ok and she was not interested in anyone else, then a summer apart given no other issues is no reason for a woman to break up with her boyfriend. I will tell you from a woman's perspective she might be interested in seeing what else and who else is out there. Also, lack of not only sexual satisfaction and connectedness or lack of physical attraction makes even the nicest and most wonderful man undesirable. Also, often the guy who is too nice does not get the girl! I'm not saying this is the case, but it is something to think about! Best of luck to all

Hello Whoever is reading this,

I dated a girl for 2 1/2 years and she left me 2 weeks ago after saving up money to live with her and being the best man I could possibly be. Here is what I learned.
Fact:
1. Love is a feeling.
2. Nothing last forever.
3. There is no such thing as a soulmate.
4. Movies are not reality.
5. No one is perfect.
6. You choose who you love. Love does not choose you.
7. Timeing is everything in relationships.
8. You will never know how the relationship failed.
9. Killing yourself is cruel to your family.
10. What does not kill you makes you stronger.
11. Time is the cure for heart brake.
12. Relationships work only when they both sacrifice.
13. There is always someone else.
14. It is better to have loved then never loved at all.
15. If you love someone let them go.
16. Out of sight out of mind. Cut all contact and belongings like pictures, love letters and facebook.
17. Never convince yourself they will come back.
18. Seek therapy.
19. Dont take depression pills. Its not reality.
20. Talk about your feelings to your loved ones.
21. Dont be alone.
22. Keep yourself busy.
23. Work out alot. Its a natural high.
24. Dont be a **** bag to women or men.
25. Dont rush into a relationship after a breakup.
26. Do things that make you happy.
27. Never make someone your world.
28. Make yourself desirable and make money.
29. Have no regrets.
30. There is plenty of fish in the sea.

- Mike Vasquez 21 years old. Email me if you need anymore advice. <email>

i knw ya pain mate just split up with my girlfriend of 3 and a half years we have a 10 month old daughter and its hard but it was my fault i made mistakes used to play computer games rather than go to bed etc but im changin my self sold my computer stoped smoking and just trying to focus on my little one its hard tho coz i have 2 see my ex all the tym n she told me she doesnt want a relationship with me either but im just gonna leave her try n give her space and see what happens who knows what will happen if we ever find our selfs back in each others arms so be it but if not ill have to pull my self up and carry on for my daughters sake love hurts more than it loves but everybody will hurt u u just need to find the ones worth hurting for if this is her i hope u find a way to fix things

chris

My ex girl firend just broke up with me like a month ago and ive been trying my hardest to leave her alone and not text or call her but my fingers always want to hit her name in my contacts list in my phone.. I'm just scared shes going to find someone else and be happy with someone else.. I really dont know what she wants and i dont think she really knows what she wants... AT ALL!!! but om going to try everything you guys said about leaving her alone and not contacting her .. if it doesnt work i guess time will only tell.. but i do miss her alot and love her but i'll just man up and wait and see..

Yaya, try not to worry - loads of people are going through the same thing as you including myself. I haven't talked to my ex girlfriend for half a year and I still think about her every day. Whenever you feel down then come to these forums and let it all out - seriously! It's healthy. Talk about it until you're so sick of the subject you annoy yourself. Take the time to have fun with your friends, go for walks, occupy yourself elsewhere. Be strong and don't act desperate around her.

so im 24 my ex girl is 31.we dated for 5 months and we kinda pushed it too fast and kinda moved in together.she has a baby with someone else that does not take care of the baby at all. the baby loves me and i fell in love with my gf .so what it comes down to is we broke up becasue she claimed she was overwhellemed with everything . she told me we have to learn how to be friends first. she claimes she is not sure if she can give me as much as attention as i deserve but she loves me. and she also she dosen't want to let me go. what should i do i'm going nuts

Hey bro I read your situation and you need to not keep in contact with her. Out of sight out of mind. She is trying to be with you and not be with you. Im sorry about your situation and believe me bro there is not a day that I dont think about my x but you need to understand its going to be hard. There is no easy way to tell you this but if she truly loved you she would be with you regardless. Let her go and love yourseld first. You know you dont deserve this so why do you put your self through all this emotion. All of us have enough drama in our life so why have this one. Let her go bro and maybe in the furure she will appreciate what she had with you and come back. But remember to love yourself first. Its her loss. You cant love someone without loveing your self. Dont let her be your world. Work out every day its a natural high. Ever since my x left me I have been working out every day and I started college. Seek therapy if your suicidal. I needed it maybe you do too. I couldnt be like this by myself I needed guidence and help. Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response. Remember dont pick up the phone when she calls and delete her from facebook and throw away everything that reminds you of her. Hang in there brother and honestly you will meet someone who will appreciate you one of these days. Nice guys finish last but I have faith its worth it because in the end I know I gave it my all and I tried to be the best man I could possibly be.

Harsh as it was---it was the absolute truth! I am a woman married for 22 years. You gave exveelent advice. She does sound immature and selfish...he needs to move on. Women desire strong, confident men...not clingy boys.

the jist of the comments here is to leave the woman alone, i agree that desperation is a very unattractive trait, my girlfriend said she was struggling, she wanted to split. i told her how much i loved her and until she specifically told me not to contact her i would fight, i told her she was worth fighting for. i think suttle things make the difference, tell her you want her in your life, not you need her, show her that you love her,and dont want to break up, but also make her aware that although it will really hurt you know that there will be life after her.