courtesy of orsorama
Men and their *****, part two.
***** is a big problem.
“Guys watch ***** and that’s just the way it is.” Men’s ***** watching tendencies are acceptable, and at least tolerated by society as a whole. Just like coffee, or alcohol its something that is not good to consume in large quantities, and ok to have once in a while is the accepted thought.
Men also have a tendency to “Rubberneck” which is what happens when something sexy walks past or is posted on the wall in a bikini and we just have to look. Throughout the years we know men do this, and ***** is part of this. Really it wasn’t a big problem until it became convienient and super avaliable.
Let me explain why ***** is bad for humans and more importantly internet *****.
Our brains have reward centers and these centers help regulate what we do. If we are hungry, our brain gives is shots of dopamine when we find food and eat. Our reward center then floods our brain with dopamine, we feel satiated because we found the food, ate it, and now feel better and don’t feel the need... the urge to eat more.
With sex, the system works in the same way. We have an instinct to copulate. When we see a pretty girl, we get shots of happy chemicals. These chemicals help us to keep trying for the girl until we have sex. Our reward center jumps in after sex (*****) and tells us we are “full” and don’t need anymore sex.
What does this have to do with *****?
***** just gives happy shots of dopamine. It gives a short high, and because the next pretty girl, or next Stimulating sex godess is just a click away... We keep clicking getting the next high, after high, after high. Over time, this is retraining our brain to bypass our internal reward system. While watching ***** we never get to the real act of sex for copulation. Our reward systems never gets the chance to tell us we are full. Pretty soon our brain is just built to find the next, most stimulating thing.
What does this look like in real life?
Now because your guy is in hiding and alone watching his *****, he is losing his ability to be with a person during intimacy because while watching ***** alone there is no intimacy.
Some have tried to solve this by watching ***** with their partner. This is admirable and really, if there’s no other way to solve this because “men watch ***** and that the way it is” then this is probably the best you can do.
I have to say that its too little too late, like putting a band-aid on the stump left behind when an arm is cut off.
His brain is wiring itself to seek out more, new and better visual stimulation and no woman can provide this unless her head is 19 inch LCD computer screen, and her hand is the mouse with clickable buttons. Watching ***** with your partner will work for a little while. It would be best to try to get him off the ***** though if you want to save a love live.
He will eventually suffer problems of ED, if watches enough ***** he will also have raised anxiety levels and this partly causes the “performance anxiety” we feel in bed with a partner. He watches enough ***** that he just can’t get it up when the real deal is sitting on his lap! There is not enough New New New going through his dopamine built neuropathways that he has built up over the years.
Any woman can compete with a sexy girl in a sexy image. Women are sexy! :). (I like women!)
No woman can compete with a brain that been rewired for ever increasing sexual stimuli... That is unless you can reach into his head and switch those darn pathways around!
The bypassing of the reward centers and the elevated happy chemical search that a brain on ***** is building itself for is a formidable opponent. There is no pill that will cure it.
Often men will enter their doctor’s office and complain that they can’t get it up for sex with their wife. The doctor checks to see if his little jimmy works, and it usually does because he can get aroused while masturbating. Hes actually really good at that at this point. :). So the doc says to him to eat better, get more excercise and gives him some blue pills. Most guys dont notice anything is wrong until their jimmy stops working.
Unless there is something physically wrong with the *****, it should work. If this is the case, then why are more and more men having trouble with how it works? The men are getting younger too. ED is being found in teens and young adults, usually people who have grown up with high-speed internet.
I have a lifetime of ***** use. Most men do in some way. Mine started with magazines, moved to VHS, then DVDs and later in life to the internet. I have an edge though, I have been having sex with real people throughout my life, and the magazines, and DVDs don’t have a webbrowser where I can tab and click to see the next most stimulating thing and the next and the next.
I actually had to look at a picture and fantasize.
With the internet, I don’t even have to do that anymore. I just go to my favorite scene, or the the scene that stimulates me most and then I can get my high. I don’t have to think about what the sex process would be and how I would go about it if I met her in real life.
None of the touching, none of the words none of the inimacy that are required for having sex with a person is available while browsing. Internet ***** just gives me stimulation, stimulation, stimulation after exhausting stimulation.
For guys who watch a lot of *****, or have grown up on internet ***** have no pathways built up in their brain where they are stimulated by a woman’s touch, her stare, her smell which are all part of lovemaking. They can’t get their jimmies to work for them during something that’s called sex.
Also, this there comes a point in watching ***** where a guy just can’t get it to work anymore even while watching *****. They can’t get an *****, and can’t *****.
This is when our brain has hit its max stimulation point and the next new thing just doesn’t do what it used to do anymore. But the urge is still there to do it, because the brain now knows only one way to act on the urge to procreate with a brain built on *****: click, click, click rub rub rub.
What do we do about all this?
Quit the *****.
Sounds easy, but its like taking food from an over eater. Its like taking crack away from an addict. ***** is so accepted in most societies that artificial sexual stimulation is used in ads, its in the strip club, its on our phones, our laptops, its on the stand at the corner store, its passed from a buddy at work, its on calenders, its in our newspapers.... Its everywhere! At least with crack, you have to find a dealer that’s hiding from the law.
You have to quit the *****.
For men who have had regular sex with a real person throughout thier lives they seem to respond quicker after quitting the *****. They are usually back to full strength within a couple of months. Its longer for men who have gone without a sex partner while viewing internet pornograghy. This all depends as well as the degree they’ve been artificially stimulated and the length of time. All in theory, are able to be rewired though.
You have to reboot the brain. Shut off the *****, stay away from ***** until the brain realizes it has to change.
You have to replace the artificial stimulation with the real thing.
This means a process has to take place and its a long one because you are trying to build new neuropathways while letting the ***** ones get weaker. Its not like taking a pill and in a few days or hours its fixed. Its a lot of time and energy from his partner. Lots of touching and lots of gentle sex which goes against what we men have been taught by ***** to do in bed and also pressure by women who want the touching, and the performance.
Oh! The anxiety!
By the way, using the pills help if you give up *****. If you don’t, the pills are only making the situation worse to the point where the pills won’t even work anymore and you aren’t noticing just how bad its getting.
Quitting ***** sounds easy, I thought it sounded easy, but its ingrained in the male culture, and now its ingrained in society. Everyone says its ok for a guy to look at *****. His peers even say that he’s not a real virile man if he doesn’t watch it. (doesn’t like to look at pictures/videos of a pretty naked woman)
I am asked to visit the strip club with guys from work. I say no, and get funny looks. Guys from work share girlfriend pics on their phone, and when I say no... I get the funny looks. When a guy shares some new found stimulation in *****, he wants to share it with ‘the guys’ and when I say no, the funny looks are there.
Get enough funny looks.... It just adds to the anxiety surrounding sex.
Your man is secretly in a bind if he’s watching *****. His viewing is part of what he’s been taught is what it is to be a man. He is supposed to perform in bed, and if there has been one single case of ED, then its all downhill if he doesn’t change his ways. He can’t perform when he should. This is mental anguish and only adds to more anxiety, which is a downward spiral.
I wanted to have an answer for you by the end of this on what to do to help make things better. The only thing I can think of is appeal to your man if he has performance anxiety, or at least one or two cases of ED to watch the videos below.
Hit ‘em where it hurts! Basically I’m saying that a man will not even consider this until he has problems with his *****. If he has had trouble with it, he is secretly dying inside. He migbt just be open to some education to make it all better.
I will leave links to videos about ***** Induced ***** Dysfunction by Doctor Oz. Its a step in the right direction and in the mainstream. Besides, how are we supposed to keep humans on the planet if nobody can have sex anymore?
Does Your Boyfriend Or Husband Watch *****? Part One