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So I was with this young lady for about one month. We have great chemistry together. The first time being together we had intimate relations which were really great and continued to do so. Than she started with that all I wanted her was for sex and I told her that wasn’t true.she said that cuz I haven’t taking her out or bought her a flower. Yeah at the moment I don’t have a job I recently had been Laidoff at my other job but I was looking hard for another job (and still am) But I had came up with some money and I invited her to dinner we had some great pasta with lobster and scalops. A bottle of wine it was really nice.We had ended the night. So like 2 days after we start talking and she had told me that she needs a guy that could invite her to dinner or for a drink and that I had no ambition. That’s funny cuz I had just invited her 2 days earlier. She said that it Was my bros money. It was his money but he gave it to me cuz he had won some money at a casino. It was still my money and she didn’t appreciate the yeah she said she doesn’t need any scubs in her life. Than I said oh is that what you think of me? She said yeah I do. That’s when I said ok than bye. She said bye also. That was this past thursday and she hasn’t called/text me and I haven’t either. For her calling me a scrub makes me feel that she never cared for me. I mean who will call a person they care for or have feelins with a scrub? I haven’t talked to her in 4 days and I miss her. I really feel like putting my pride aside and call her but another part of me feels disrespected. I feel like if she really cared for me she will be by my side and try to lift me up and be there for me through the good times and the bad times. It seems to me she just wants a guy that could invite her to whatever she wants. I need a woman that would love me no matter what not just when I’m doing good. Makes me feel like true love doesn’t exist. I will admit I’m not doing to good financial but I know that I’m a good person with a great heart with alot of love to give. If someone isn’t going to be their for me through thick and thin than their not worth it.
So... what do you think? Please leave me a comment or give me a


  • heartsbreak: Awww. You poor guy. I’m sending you hugs and kisses. You are not a scrub at all. If you were, you wouldn’t have even have bothered to go out of your way to ask your brother for money and you could have used the money for yourself because I know you need it more than buying her a fancy dinner. This girl is in for a rude awakening if she thinks that a guy is going to wine and dine her all the time. Money is tight with pretty much everybody and lots of couples are staying in and cooking dinner at home. Even singles who go on dates now a days keep it light with coffee and drinks until the decide this is the person they want to keep dating. Besides plenty of women pay for their men or split the check. I always do and I know plenty of women who do as well. Listen even the richest man could lose all his money in a second. A long time employee could lose their job tomorrow and their partners don’t leave them if they love them and care about them.
    This girl was after what she could get and this is why she had sex with you so fast. She figured that if she gave you some, you would shower her with gifts and take her places. Not so. She did this because she has nothing else to offer and now you know that. A girl that sleeps with you really fast has an objective because girls like that know they can give sex to get a guy to stay with them. If she cared for you at all, she would look past that you don’t have a job, but one day you will. Dating is not all about going out. It’s better to do cheap things like a walk in the park or cuddling on the couch while watching a movie. This way you get to know each other. This girl is jaded by men and assumes old fashioned things about them. If she had sex with you of course you are going to assume that will continue and not have to wait until you buy her flowers. If she wanted that then she should have worked up to it and got to know you better instead of calling you a scrub.
    Focus on yourself and try not to miss a girl that disrespects you in that way. With that attitude she will surely be short on dates because guys today and quick to point a scrub like her who only wants me for what she wants. Yes she is a scrub because of how she acts and what she said. You just focus on getting a job and then find a girl who will love you no matter what and stick by you through thick and thin. She’s out there.
  • thetruthhurts: Wow thank you so much for responding to my post. You made me see that I wasn’t the one in the wrong. One dAy I will be better off and I know it. This woman is a really pretty Colombian but not on the inside. At first everything was great how she treated me but she changed on me cuz of money. It’s pretty sad but whatever she will know what she let go eventually.I don’t need a woman like that in my life. I mean I do miss the sex alot. So I’m not sure if I should call her or not. What do you think?
  • heartsbreak: No don’t call her just because you miss the sex because then you are proving her point in that you just wanted her for sex. You already know she will not be into it because sex is all you can give her and she wants much more than that. And then once you get a job she will use you for money. Pretty on the outside fades and do you really want to have sex with a girl who thinks you are a scrub? I don’t think so. Do not call her because she does not deserve your intimacy. Why make her feel good when she made you feel bad.
  • thetruthhurts: Thank you soo much! You are very knowledgeable with your words of wisdom. It makes me feel so much better,your right she doesn’t deserve my intimacy. It was never just about the sex with her though I really wanted to be with her. Sex wasnt the only thing i gave her love also..But I guess only time will tell. I have a job interview tomorrow and good things are coming my way. I feel like you were an angel that was sent to give me this advice. I’m soo stupid for even still thinking about her ughhh I just wonder about what if I was to call her... I mean she called me a scrub that’s a sign of disrespect. Shouldn’t she be the one with remorse and trying to get in contact with me? Well I guess only a person would do that only if they truly had feelings for the person :(
  • heartsbreak: Well thank you for your kind words. People say things that hurt us all the time and you are right, if they cared they would come back and say they were sorry. But just as much as there is good in this world, there is evil. You don’t need an apology from her because she won’t mean it. You don’t need validation from a woman that deep down hates herself and has not respect. It’s a good thing this relationship only lasted a month because it would have hurt worse if there was more time invested. Good luck on your interview and when you get the job, don’t call her about it.
  • thetruthhurts: You very welcome!!! Yeah Im not going to call her ever again :)))
  • thetruthhurts: Ughhh I have been thinking about calling her all day but I haven’t. I’m wondering if she misses me or thinks about me. This really sucks cuz I’m wondering if a phone call from will make a difference or not? Like What if she’s waiting for me to call and she’s holding her pride also. But she’s the one that called me a scrub. I forgot to mention to you that the last phone conversation we had was last Thursday and we weren’t together as a couple but we were still talking but that’s when she told me that she needed a guy that could treat her to dinner and drinks. So when she called me a scrub I got upset and told her ok bye and she also said ok bye. Since last thursday I haven’t called her and she hasn’t either. Do you think it was a good decision for me to say ok bye to her after her calling me a scrub? What if she’s not calling me back cuz I said bye to her? Ahhh idk I’m confused right now
  • heartsbreak: Well what were you supposed to say? Thank you? If she was sorry for hurting you she would have called and said so. But it looks like she meant what she said and wanted to hurt your feelings. You need to have pride and not call her. Give it a few days. How did the job interview go?
  • itachi: I have a different opinion. You are a scrub (on the context as above) and you are a hypocrite. Here’s why. Look at her words. She said, it WASN’T YOUR MONEY. She probably was noticing the trend whole time. Not having a job is different and not standing up in your feet is different. It doesn’t cost to give her just a flower, does it? She isn’t a gold digger. She wants a man who actually can stand up to his integrity. It doesn’t mean financial only. From your post, i can say it applies to your different aspects as well. E.g. Your bro won the money, gave it you. You are making it sound like it was hard earned. No dude, it was a favor. You can’t have that attitude when you get a favor. I am sure she probably would have been happy just eating an ice cream road side had the initiative come from you. You don’t need fancy dinners to get a girl (reading your post, she certainly is simple but has high value for what she believes). That’s why she didn’t count that dinner. A man can be out of job, may not have money.... But the attitude you showed here, will be a downfall in future. It may sound rude what i said, but she definitely isn’t evil here.
  • thetruthhurts: @heartbreaks yeah I guess she did mean what she said now I know her true colors. And the interview went good cross your fingers for me jaja :) And do you agree what itachi is saying? @itachi so what do you suggest I do? Look for her and call her? And I wasn’t acting like the money my bro had giving me was hard earned. I understand where your coming from but she did disrespect me and hasn’t been intouch with me. Should I send her flowers? Do you think that would make things better?
  • thetruthhurts: Or do I call her and tell her how what she had called me made me upset so I got a little distant. Do I tell her that I miss her and have been thinking about her? I mean valentines is coming up should I just give in? Like a chump. Maybe she already has someone else or sleeping with someone else idk that’s what I keep thinking
  • heartsbreak: I think if you feel you have more to say and want more answers than call her and clear the air. Maybe she just needs to hear that you are working on getting a job but for now you just want to know if she likes you enough to stick by you. Call her and find out the truth.
  • thetruthhurts: I do feel like I need to talk to her cuz I just told her bye when she told me that so I feel like if I have some part to do with her not calling me. But I want to take your advice cuz it was very true what you said but I just wonder about the what if’s you know? I do feel like she’s thinking about me but at the same time I’m wondering maybe she doesn’t give a **** about me and just moved on. Or maybe she sees that I’m not calling her and she’s doing the same. Whatever I’m not going to call her I’ll just feel more bad if she doesn’t answer.

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