my ex loves my best friend but im still in love with him!:(

So i'd had a crush on this guy for ages and one day he asked me if i'd go out with him, i said yes of course and i felt like the happiest girl in the world, whenever i saw him or hugged him or even spoke to him i felt soo in love with him, but then after a couple of weeks he broke up with me, i still love him now and i cant get over him. And now about a month after he broke up with me he's saying that he really likes my best friend. She used to say that she'd necer go out with him because she wouldnt do that to me, but now she's talking to him more she's started thinking about actually going out with him, i love her to pieces and i know she would never do anything to hurt me but i dont know if i can stand seeing them with each other, i've cried so much in the past couple of weeks because i know that even though i love him so much, he doesnt feel the same way about me. I know everyones probably going to say that i'll get over him but i dont want to, i love him so much and would do anything for him to be mine again. I really dont know what to do?

Posted on Jealousy
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grey avatar
3 years ago #2
grey
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hey keewey, when you say he broke up with you then said he likes your best friend, did he actualy tell you that? was there any real closure? meaning if you havent, ask him why things happened how they did and if there is still a chance. It is hard to get over people we really fall for but if its over then its over and really only time will heal. Just talk to him and if he is a decent guy he will be honest with you. some guys arent though and know how to play a part to get what the want..if you only dated for a month maybe he was going for your friend all along. i dont know. but my advice is to put him on the spot. you will get the response you need to move on.

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K
3 years ago #3
Keewey:3
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hi grey, when i heard from a friend that he liked my best friend, and then i didnt know whether it was true or not so i did put him on the spot and ask him if he liked her. He said that it was true and then we got into a massive argument over it, we made up eventually, and then today my best friend told me that he was dating her! I have to see them both tomorrow and im going to have to sit there watching them hugging and everything. I know that we can never be boyfriend and girlfriend again but i still want to be like his best friend or something because i still want to be involved in his life, but i dont knownhow to become close enough again.

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FoxieLadie avatar
3 years ago #4
FoxieLadie
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Keewey,

I don't understand how you can call this girl your recently ex-boyfriend is seeing your BEST FRIEND! She told you she would never do anything like this to you and now she is dating the guy you love and want. That sure doesn't sound like a best friend to me! I have to tell you that my ex-boyfriend got friendly with a female friend of mine, and both of them said they would never date behind my back. About a year ago, I broke up with my ex because he was cheating on me with other women. Now, I came to find out that she was one of the women he was seeing. And, here both of them told me it never was going to happen! When I confronted her about it, she became very nasty and actually told me I can stick him up my *** instead of being apologetic. I didn't expect any apologies from him since I was the one who ended my relationship with him.

The first thing I think you need to do is lose your "best friend" because she never was any friend of yours. As far as he is concerned, I think you should first tell him how you feel about him and tell him how you feel about this situation. I think you need to tell him you love him and want him back. Then, if he tells you he prefers your best friend, if I were you, I would stop talking to him too. If he misses you, he will come back. If he doesn't, I would say good riddance to both of them.

Don't think you're alone, though. It can happen to any of us!

Foxie

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K
3 years ago #5
Keewey:3
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I feel mean though, she likes him and he likes her. She's my best friend and we do everything together. I dont want to lose any of them!


Keewey

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c
2 years ago #6
camryngul
Guest

the same thing is happening to me. when I realized my best friend had feelings and was flirting with my ex (that I still like a lot) I thought maybe I should tell her how I felt about the whole situation. I told her that I still liked him and that it was uncomfortable for me, however she ignored my feelings and kept on flirting with my ex. what crushes me most is that all my other friends know I like him but they keep telling my best friend about how they should date! it's a hard thing to cope with

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M
2 years ago #7
Myriad
Guest

The loser cruiser stopped at a really nice looking platform, gently edged you on to the winner's circle, and picked up two idiots. These two are riding that karma bus with a vengeance. If I were you, I'd start growing flowers where you stopped off and enjoy the scenery. That bus is going to crash and you don't want to be on it.

Let em go.

Love and light,
M

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l
2 years ago #8
lisa
Guest

I bet your amazing girl don't waste your life on one guy that never felt the same way as you. You still young you have much to learn, there several guys ten times better than him so don't worry about that ****. If your best friend date him than she's not really your friend let both of them go. Because the exact thing happened to me, what I did is I forgot about them act like he meant thing to you


love, lisa

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S
2 years ago #9
Sophie
Guest

Hi I am in the same place I had a crush on this guy and then he asked me out after a while it ended . now he is dating my beat friend but I can't get over him I still really like him .

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GettingOverHim avatar
1 year ago #10
GettingOverHim
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Keep your head up sweetie you will come out on top after the dust settles. I do need to inform you and every other female on here who has an ex who is now dating your best friend.

For starters shevis not your friend. Friends dont do that. The guy is a creep and your better off without him. My issue is with these girls picking up leftovers.

My friends and I have lived by a code since Middle School. We dont date one anothers ex boyfriends its wrong and its nasty.

If you havent already done so. Cut her lose she has proven her true worth in your life. Make both of them non factors in your world and find you a better best friend who will be loyal to you and you guys friendship

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E
1 year ago #11
Elly
Guest

I'm I'm the same situation ! Even tho I'm a teen . I broke up with my ex bc he was mean to me now he likes my best friend I got upset bc she knows I love him to death and I miss him she ignored my feelings and texted him once we broke up they texted I confronted her about it she lied to me about it but I got the truth out of her . I confronted him about it also we got In a big fight now I don't talk to any of them if I do we always fight .

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A
1 year ago #12
Acilegna
Guest

The same thing is happening to me right now. I dated this guys for 4 months, then he cheated on my with best friend. And HE'S the one who broke up with me before I got the chance. After he broke mine and my best friends heart, he tried to get both of us back, but we declined. Now he is going out with my other best friend. I really don't want her to get hurt. But a part of my is still in love with this guy. Does anyone have any advice? please help.

- acilegna

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x
1 year ago #13
x31_m3
Guest

If I was u I wouldn't talk to any of them just cut ur "best friend" of . If she was truly your best friend u wouldn't be in this mess to start with . So just pretend like you don't care and make them see that u arnt going to be miserable over a **** that is fake or a man that honestly never loved you .

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J
1 year ago #14
Josei_.
Guest

Hi Your in exactly the same bit that am in he said that we would probably never happen agen but my ex loves my best friend But am still in love with him and cry now and then but my best friend said that she would never go out with him But they are starting to open up to each other and I love them both to bits

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A
9 months ago #15
Aisha mufsad
Guest

Omg sameeeee but if he likes ur best friend tell him u still like him

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A
7 months ago #16
Aly
Guest

I'm going through the same thing! At this moment, my best friend is on the phone with my ex, they are dating and he is being way more sweeter then he was to me. It hurts

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gymgirlie avatar
7 months ago #17
gymgirlie
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Oh that is so not good.

So you know that you get ditched if this goes ahead?

That is really awkward.

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T
6 months ago #18
Tamster
Guest

I am in the same situation and I tried to just hide my feelings and just be "happy" for them. Maybe it's best if you just tell him how you feel or maybe it's best if you just hide it. I know it stinks but maybe it's for the best. Would you rather have your best friend or your ex?😬

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h
6 months ago #19
huugggeee problem
Guest

omg saammmee so i really like this guy lets call him A and one day he asked me out of course i said yes but then he broke up with me because he moved and i accepted it but i was really sad but i found out he actually started dating one of my other kinda friends like the day after he broke up with me and that kinda hurt but now they broke up but i still think about him everyday anndd i found out that all three of my best friends secretly hated A! they would apparently always talk about him behind my back but pretended to be supportive to me, i know that because since we broke up they decided to tell me. But now one of those three girls lets call her S. She is now liking him all of a sudden but i think its because he looks a lot more attractive then he did before which is stupid of her but whatever. Now I'm pretending to everyone even the my other two best friends that i don't like him anymore and that i'm totally supportive of A and S relationship. Now i found out that S is mad at me because A lied to her and told her that i was talking bad about her! They are dating and of course shes not gonna believe me anymore, but she keeps taking away my other friends and its awkward. IDK WHAT TO DO SOMEONE HELPPPP!!!!!!

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gymgirlie avatar
6 months ago #20
gymgirlie
Wiz
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S is kinda really out there.

Confront.

Ask her if she believes the bad things he is saying and tell her you think he is just being hurtful to alienate you. Ask him, why are you saying bad things about me and alienating me, you have a problem?

Ask your other two friends why they think this is happening.

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T
5 months ago #21
Takalani yvonne
Guest

Never give up for the onces that you love never say you foot love someone if you cant let go true love hurts if you love something set it free and let it go if it comes back to you it was meant to be if it doesnt then it was never yours it was not meant to be it take a couple of seconds to say hello but it takes a lifetime to say goodbye

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T
5 months ago #22
Takalani yvonne
Guest

Never give up for the onces that you love never say you dont love someone if you cant let go true love hurts if you love something set it free and let it go if it comes back to you it was meant to be if it doesnt then it was never yours it was not meant to be it take a couple of seconds to say hello but it takes a lifetime to say goodbye

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Johnny Nicks avatar
5 months ago #23
Johnny Nicks
Scholar
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It was wise words so worth saying twice..

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Angela17 avatar
5 months ago #24
Angela17
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I never really understand that saying "if you really love something, set it free..."

I love my cats and I want to keep them close to me. Do I have to set them free, just open my front door, let them go out in the street and hope that they will come back to me if they meant to be mine?

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K
5 months ago #25
KB
Guest
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R
3 months ago #26
Rebecca
Guest

It's happened to me recently when I just came out of a relationship but I still liked him and now my best friend won't stop talking infront of m of how much they like each other !! It's so hard to get over with out making a big fuss

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J
3 months ago #27
Justme
Guest

This is currently what I'm going through and it's really tough. We were all still close but now I feel like if they start dating that I will not want to be around them because I can't handle it therefore pretty much ending the friendship. It's a hard situation.

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C
2 months ago #28
Cat
Guest

Seeing these replies i think this happens(unfortunately) more than you'd think, to me too. At first i was dating E in freshmen yr who was also seeing another girl at the time for about 2 wks, and he became really important to me bc he was also my 1st kiss. Now, 2yrs later, we start to reconnect and he begins telling all these sweet things that really boost me up, so ofc the feelings are back so i begin telling my 2 besties J and C. E and i invite C to eat with us and eventually she does(since freshmen yr she always hated E bc he cheated) and she actually gets really close with E which i didn't mind at first bc i saw it as 2 of my best buds having a good time. Later on i tell C about my feelings for E, 2 days later E asks her out and she accepts so i guess overall i was heart broken, still am. They dated for 2 wks but broke up recently and i do really love him but E loves C and i could never be her plus i don't want to do what she did to me. Oh well i guess that's what happens when you catch feelings~

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N
1 month ago #29
Nelly
Guest

I'm really sorry to hear that... Something like that is actually happening to me, My guy kissed my best friend and after she told me, i just lost it and said some stuff i wasn't supposed to say and he said he couldn't be with me anymore. cause he was starting to have feelings for my best friend, i cried myself to sleep that night.. Woke up in the morning and found a missed call from him, when i texted he asked who i was... This been torturing me for the past days

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B
1 month ago #30
Bro
Guest

Hey i went thru a similar story. I suffer from anxiety, and this guy that my best friend is great friends with asked me out, and i liked him so i said yes. But after a week i was kinda feelin weird so i was considering breaking up with him but i still liked him. It all fell apart when i was going to introduce him to my friend but she brought her boyfriend (who i have a history with and hate him so much) and i had an anxiety attack and broke up with my boyfriend out of pressure and now my best friend hates me and she likes him but i still like him and I feel like **** because this is all my fault

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