My girl isn't feeling it anymore

My girl has not given up on me yet but feels that I am not fulfilling her needs emotionally. I have been very bad at "doing the little things". She is losing interest and I don't feel I may be able to win her back. What can I do to show I am capable of doing what she needs? Planning nights out, setting up candles, etc. Any suggstions are desperately needed!

hiya Chole, welcome to the forum - I hope you will like it here.


Suggestions as to the 'little things' are really difficult to give but special attention given to the small things should be a daily 'core'. Stick a memo on the fridge with 'i love you' on it, or send her an old fashioned picture postcard with some sweet message on it, phone her around the time you know she had lunch and ask if she has eaten and what. Order tickets to some show you know she likes without her knowing about it until the moment you stand in front of the entrance. Etc. Etc. Etc.....

Hey Chole,

it sounds like to me that your girl wants a deeper connection with you, that's all. That's the main emotional need that she is craving. The "little things" are simply a consistent reminder that you love her. Personally when it comes to the little things I like to be as creative and clever as possible. for example:

Just through everyday conversation I picked up that my gf really loved little kids books, even to this day, and would love to read to her baby sister all the time. So in a some what joking manner I promised her that I would read her a little kids book one day, her favorite book, I found out what her favorite book as a child was.

Then later on I found this book, recorded it with my voice with a mic through recording software, added sound effects and made it into an audio book to put on CD. She absolutely loved it, and it showed to what lengths I would go just to do something thoughtful for her.

Try and think of something like that, think about specific things about her, and then come up with something that will rock her world.

Jim, welcome to the forum

"What can I do to show I am capable of doing what she needs? Planning nights out, setting up candles, etc. Any suggstions are desperately needed!"

Yes...actually do what you just said... I can explain how to put a candle on the table or order food..but I am sure you are capable of doing that yourself...so seriously, just do it!