Why are men threatened by an Indepdnt,educted womn

Do they just feel "inferior?" Why is it, when a woman is educated, self-sufficient, knows what she wants, and what she will tolerate (and NOT tolerate) in a relationship...why do they equate this with 'Feminisim??' I love being a girly-girl...but I can also run with the "big dogs" when I have to...why is this such a threat to men??

Post edited by: cayden, at: 2007/01/06 08:58

There have been lots of threads about this. In your specific case it could be the chip on your shoulder, and the way you talk about men, or the way you feel about them which shows through. Being on guard against a MCP archetype colors one's outlook, and appearance to others. Some men will be uncomfortable around a woman they feel is smarter than them, but it's not about feeling threatened, usually it's just that the woman is unpleasant. She could test the theory by making an effort to be kind and friendly, which men tend to react to well. Girded for battle, quick to judge, seeing "pigs" in every shadow at every opportunity, she will not win admiration. The intelligent, educated, independent, etc. women who like men and treat them with respect, easily find a mate, for they offer qualities and love very much in demand. Share your views with like minded friends at www.vois.com

not all men are like that...

Doesn't it depend on the type of man? It's probably just one of those 'personal preferences' each one has {Emotions-0002011C.gif}

I've tend to date a lot of independent women. And it's usually what I go for. But a lot give off the aura of they don't need a man in there life. As your independent you will need to make some sacrifices to make a man feel needed. We have feelings to you know.

The feelings that one needs another should be reciprocal.

In my experience it's more about these women being more flighty if the man she's with isn't as successful as her.

I've always viewed anyone I'm in a relationship with as an equal, but there's been times when my career hasn't gone to plan - that's when these types of women start looking elsewhere.

I'm not sure if it's the same in reverse as I have never been in a relationship with a man.

Is that so, AndyTheBassMan? That is very interesting because not heard of so much. Usually women will stick by their partner regardless of his career. At least, that is my impression.

I can only go from my experience Ayngel, and I would never try to say all women are like that. I know I was just unlucky at certain points in my life!

I'm just trying to give a different perspective on this, sorry if I offended you!

No you didn't offend me at all of course. I thought it was only interesting to know since I personally have never known of women making a problem out of the temporary or final lag in proceeding their careers.

I hope you'll have better luck next time because love shouldn't depend on materialistic things or expectations society dictates.

I fully agree.

I don't think they all are.

I haven't been on these boards in forever in a half, but I have dated independent women and know a thing or two.

Really I'll just be reiterating what an earlier poster mentioned of that type of woman being more 'flighty'.

I've found that when a woman is genuinely 100% taken care of in most aspects that they are indeed more apt to up and leave the day life doesn't go the way they want.

In anyone desiring a relationship, one of the key components comes from knowing you are an integral part of someones life, indispensable.

Maybe you are just focusing too much on what you have? It is sort of like a friend I once had who was always talking about his big house and his big tv's and fancy cars. When you have nice things, it is very hard to talk about it without it coming off as a 'show off' to some people.

Most guys who want to fall in love, want it to be with someone who has maybe gone through hard times and understands how they work.

My ex fiance never understood these things and after 5 years I finally left her because of her inability to sympathize for problems I was trying to balance.

Love should be that old coat you put on because it warms you in the snow, not that flashy and fashionable pair of slippers you wear just to complete the wardrobe.

Then again, maybe none of this applies to you? Coming from my own words I would say that independent and educated women are almost never threatening to me or my happiness, but I would be more tuned into analyzing that type of woman's personality before taking the walk.

It is kind of analogous of the woman with 3 kids who belong to different fathers. You don't ward away a woman because of it, but it definitely makes you more careful

I really don't think men necessarily have a problem with this. Being intelligent and successful in fact can be quite the turn-on for a man who has a healthy outlook on life.
Personally I think it's the attitude that can too easily go with this... sort of being too strident and difficult to be around. I do think men enjoy a bit of ego-stroking too, which may be silly but there it is and it doesn't ultimately mean that they won't be proud of your achievements just that sometimes a bit of tact and just being nice and sweet can go a long way.

All men are different you can speak for yourself on that one! You mean all the mean that you have encountered are like that! I know me personally I love a women who can hold her own there is nothing like a independent women! Go listen to Ne Yo new song miss Independent I couldn't of said it better my self!

I feel it's only a threat to those men who aren't sure of what they want. You need to find a man that knows what direction his life is headed and is secure in his manhood.

At the same time because you have had to be independent you have to be careful not step on his toes as a man. Some women have had to run things for so long on their own when they find a man they may forget to let him be the man.
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